Paris Hilton told the U.K. edition of Elle magazine that she’s ready to have kids. I’ll let that sink in for a minute. Okay, for those of you who didn’t just jump out the window after staring the decline of civilization in the face, here are Paris thoughts on her new look on life, as reported by E! Online:
On what people think about her
“I wanna have like a family and a guy. Y’know, it just upsets me because I'm not anything like what people say about me, and this cartoon character that they've made of me is just completely false. It makes me mad that I'm such a good person and I'm treated like that by some people, I just don't get it.”
On how she's prepping for pregnancy
“I just started working out and it feels great. It gives me so much energy. I want kids next year, so I've got to get my body ready.”
On the potential sperm-donor
“I used to care about looks, but I've grown out of that stage. They have to be a good person, someone I know would be a good husband, loyal and funny and smart. And somebody I can trust, with good chemistry. But I don't know, I like a guy who can make me laugh.”
Game over. It’s been a good run. I’ll see you all in a few years when we’re living in caves, battling each other with rocks for food. Somebody freeze Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. We’ll need their incessant lust for procreation to repopulate the planet. What a great start to my day. I start trolling the net for gossip and end up finding out the apocalypse is waiting to burst out of Paris Hilton’s uterus. You could tell me that air causes cancer, and I’d be like, that's nothing; Paris Hilton wants to have kids.
Some more shots of Paris looking like she'd be an exemplary parent after the jump.
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